Monday, October 29, 2007

Day 6 - Hell and high water

(posted by Stinkographer 1)

Oh dear God.

"The light's been flickering off on occasion," my friend stated as he handed me his flashlight. "I think we'll need to buy new batteries. You should be fine for tomorrow though." Famous last words.

The bathroom was empty. Our decaying mass can now clearly be smelled from across the room, though at this point it's not unbearable. I entered the stall, stood on the shower bench and pushed back the celing tile. As per usual, I turned on the flashlight and set it on an adjacent tile, illuminating the meat. I reached into the ceiling with my camera, aimed, and pressed the button.

It was at this moment that the flashlight shut off. An instant later I heard the shutter click, but it was too late. Sure enough, in the darkness the camera snapped a blurred photo. About 20 seconds later the flashlight turned back on briefly, then off again. This pattern repeated itself indefinitely, with increasingly-sporadic lighted intervals.

Now, I normally hold my breath while taking photos, but the malfunctioning flashlight forced me to stand there for an extended duration, waiting with the camera poised for a period of light. Finally I decided I had no choice but to breathe normally. With my head in the ceiling, I took a deep breath and inhaled raw stench. I felt my stomach churn, but I stood my ground, continuously muttering Mahlon's famous words: "for science!"

I spent over five minutes with my head in the chamber, five minutes of pure hell. I'm only thankful that our flashlight had problems now, while the smell is tolerable enough to repress my gag reflex. On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is no smell and 10 is the strongest, most foul odor I could possibly imagine, I'd give the meat a 6. Mind you, I have a pretty wild imagination.

As for visual commentary, the cat food gravy seems to be drying up. The ground beef is darker than ever. Not too much new to be said except for one observation about game hen: what is that white mass at the top-left of this picture?

Here's the plate from a different angle. What IS that white thing that the chicken seems to be spewing forth? Although the idea that it's some sort of fungus excites me, I think it actually looks more like plastic. Perhaps this little guy came with a giblet sack--the guts that they leave inside the chicken to make gravy with. I guess we neglected to take those out, but apparently some mysterious force has corrected our error. Perhaps we've discovered a new fundamental force? Gravitational force, electromagnetic force, strong and weak forces--and the rotting meat force. And you people thought this experiment was all fun and games!

Of course, this presents another entertaining thought: after 6 days' worth of giblet decay, rupturing that bag may release a gas potent enough to burn a hole through the ozone layer...

One final note--Good news! The shower drain appears to have clogged, leaving about 2 inches of stale, cloudy water on the shower floor. That means anyone who smells the meat may suspect that the odor is coming from the drain instead!

Continue to Day 7


stewie said...

ooh, pop the giblet sack! Do it! DO IT!!!

Jed said...

Perhaps with the proper equipment...maybe a haz-mat suit and a flame thrower for easy clean-up

Ms Mellymel's Headspace said...

I think popping the bag would be cool, but wouldn't it be better if it popped on it's own? Once you set an experiment in motion...I'm not sure you should doctor it. Also, nice luck with the shower being plugged up.

Hell, maybe you ought to do a follow up experiment after Thanksgiving by placing giblet bags in various locations...some popped and others intact. I'll bet the stench would be quite loathsome and the time it takes for the bags to pop could be worth placing bets on. I'm just saying....

Keep up the good work men! I'm eating salad from now on.

Jed said...

It's possible that the bag might not actually be decaying all that much. Rot required oxygen, and the giblets are, after all, in a plastic bag. I guess we'll have to wait and see.

Stinkymeat Tufts Chapter said...

Jed presents an interesting point. Maybe we ought to let it fester for a while longer. Don't want to waste a perfectly good haz-mat suit. I think those things are only good for one use, after all.

Mellymel, your coordinated giblet bag experiment is intriguing. However, with global terrorism being such a major concern these days, I would hate to provide inspiration for a wave of nightmarish biological attacks.

Ms Mellymel's Headspace said...

You have a point there Stinkymeat Tufts Chapter. Homeland Security can get pretty nasty these days. I guess I'm just too excited by the whole process. Is that wrong *furrowed brow w/ a smirk*?

Anonymous said...

not all decay requires oxygen. anaerobic bacteria live w/out oxygen.

Jed said...

And anaerobic respiration would likely mean fermentation, which means that there could be some kind of meat liquour forming in there. Who wants a shot?

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